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Dealing, Coping, Thriving- Part One

If you’ve been following along with our weekly blogs, you may have noticed an overarching theme. Many of our blogs focus on the fact that when negative situations occur, you will most likely feel negatively BUT there is a difference between helpful negative emotions (e.g., worry, concern, and sadness) and unhelpful negative emotions (e.g., anger, depression, anxiety). In these blogs, we emphasize the importance of learning to think differently about negative and challenging situations, so that you can react in more helpful ways. We first focus on emotions and behaviors before practical problem solving, because it is much more difficult to learn (and utilize) new strategies and skills when we’re emotionally charged (e.g., think about trying to ask for a promotion when you’re feeling so anxious that you can barely speak). The BEW approach helps you to move from just dealing with negative and challenging situations to coping with these types of situations. But...then what? Once you’re coping, it’s time to take steps to change the things that are within your control, so that you can start thriving.

There are numerous articles across the web that discuss: “5 Ways to Know When it’s Time to Leave Your Job,” or, “The 15 Steps to Figuring Out if it’s Time to Find a New Career,” or, “The 30 ways to Know if You're Reaching Your Full Potential"- but, that’s not what I’m going to do. Don’t get me wrong, many of these articles are incredibly helpful and filled with valuable advice. But, just as we all respond differently to situations, we all have different goals and opinions about our career. For example, many of us have encountered a person who doesn’t feel challenged at work, isn’t sure that there are growth opportunities at their current job, and dreads going to work each day. However, on the opposite end of the spectrum, you may know a person at the same company who loves the predictability and structure, enjoys the fact that each day is similar, and demonstrates little concern about the future. Same type of job, but two very different evaluations! That’s why it’s tricky to present a one-size-fits all model to help you know when it’s time for a change.

At BEW, we are huge proponents of goal setting (as you may have noticed from our social media posts @bewtraining). Goal setting is important because it gives us a metric to define what success and professional development means to us, and whether or not we are acting in ways consistent with OUR goals, or veering away from OUR goals. The operative word is “OUR.” Goals, aspirations, and success look different for each of us. That’s why it’s important to define your long-term goals and to think about the paths to get there. This way, you can recognize when your path shifts (which may not be a bad thing). However, if you feel lost, or you no longer know where you’re going, this could signal that it’s time to think about making a change.

Stay tuned next week as we delve deeper into concrete strategies to approach goal setting, as well as discuss the importance of defining and measuring goals when moving from coping to thriving.

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